Depression is the inability to construct a future.
– Rollo May
During a recent exchange on my private Facebook group, The Most Magical Secret, there was a discussion of the challenges many of us are facing at the moment. I later posted about recent reports that suicide rates for those in midlife (45-64) are at a 30-year high with the steepest growth since 2006. Each of you reading this has the unique ability to impact all of this for the better!
Indeed, we have the skill set and personal growth tools to bring hope (a vision that there is a positive end in sight and that there is a place to go for help) to those around us.
So . . . I’m reposting/updating a portion of what I wrote with the intent that we commit this week to creating a magical REVOLUTION . . .
. . . That we each commit to creating tools for others and help bring their pain, stress and worry to an end. Life is too precious, in my view, not to make this our obligation.
I had asked those in the Facebook group:
What do you think are the biggest reasons for people’s current pain, stress, and worry?
The responses were interesting and quite in line with the actual studies that have been done.
All of the responses, of course, have to do with massive change (or loss) that someone experiences. When you go through changes like this, it feels like you’ve been kicked in the gut. It feels like your power has been taken from you, or that you’ve given it away, or that you’ve let it slip from you.
And sometimes you don’t quite remember how it all happened.
It’s neither an empowering place to be nor a mighty place to work from.
These situations are raw.
They’re maddening as hell.
They erode your confidence.
And they suck your Magic away.
I could go on and on. Suffice to say that I’ve learned (and I’m still learning) a few things. If I might, let me pass a few of them on to you in the hope that today they do just that; that they provide you with *hope* and *power* and *energy* to move to a more creative place:
1. Everything happens for a reason. However, we must learn to walk with and embrace the Mystery of life. Sometimes we just need to trust in ourselves, our future, and our life skills. It’s all going to be okay. Remember that above all else.
2. The doubt that you feel . . . the doubt that robs you of your power and your identity and your desire . . . is temporary. This, too, shall pass. Get mad. Get pissed. Get a plan. Go through the stages of grief. Then, get going. Time is precious and you’re wasting it by not getting up every morning, giving thanks for what you do have, and then making the best of what you want to create that particular day.
3. Take it a day at a time. (From someone who plans everything and is a control freak, that’s saying a lot. I’m still learning this one by the way.)
4. Trust your instincts and your intuition. You’ve been gifted with what’s happening to you right now for a purpose. I don’t know that we always know what that purpose is. But I do know that the Universe has a way of conspiring for your own good. So, what if your primary obligation tomorrow (or whenever you’re reading this) is just to be . . . Happy? That’s it. Happy. What does happiness look like for you? When you start moving towards “that” and stop moving away from anything that is “not happiness,” the world and your disposition and your soul take on a different shine.
5. You might fail or fall down or get slapped in the face again. Yep, shit happens. To the best of us. You don’t have to like it. I certainly don’t. My first reaction is to turn on my warrior mode. Others will retreat as their initial reaction. Still others might simply become indecisive. The point of such a failing or falling or hurting is to understand there’s a part of you that is growing with each defeat or bumped knee or bruised jaw. This isn’t about philosophy or theory or some vague “it’s going to be alright” position. This is the cold, hard truth. I’ll say it again: Shit happens. But . . . so do you. Clean up the crap that’s been dumped in and on you. Then move on.
6. There is always someone in this world who loves you. Being loved, by the way, is an awesome responsibility and experience. Revel in it and use it as fuel to move to a better place.
7. Magic always comes with a price. Sometimes we don’t know what that price is until after it’s paid and when we look back on our experiences with 20/20 hindsight.
8. You have a support system (and you might not even know it). It’s okay to be weak and need help and cry out and accept help. It will keep you humble. And it will show you that, yes, you do matter. To a lot of people.
9. Don’t lose your humanity. In times like this when it is so easy to move to a stress reaction mode. Do that often enough, and you become the worst version of you. Take a step back and gain perspective. Meditate. A lot. Find your center and keep remembering who you really are. In times like this, where there is a whirlwind of change, it’s so easy to lose yourself. The easiest way to find yourself again is to laugh. Often. Hard. Deeply.
10. Love. Often. Hard. Deeply.
Thanks for letting me share with you.
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